[Saba_Baran90]

Today was hell of a lot worse than i expected
I'm pretty sure it's just me
Cause all the universe cant be so unkind when it comes to understanding how alone some people are
God! I never thought that I'd ever feel so bad about myself
I dont even have the strength to fight anymore
It is so easy fer every body to humiliate me and I feel my world so far away from theirs that i dont even take the time to react, to fight back
It's like I'm a 100 years older than every body else around me
I feel gray, dark gray
The sky honored me by helping me run my harmony of loneliness
It's been a long time now
I find sparks, I stick to them to prove the world that I'm still alive and the more i try, the harder it beats me, hard enough for me to fall on the ground
The more i try to be proud, the more it gets broken
Some days life just sucks(Zendegi gande) like it did today
I watch every body easily having things i dont think I could ever have and the bitter parts is where i dont even know why
Looking around you and feeling the bitter sting of people's words perforating your soul, loneliness scratching you deep enough to make your soul bleed
And it's just to much
When you are only 21 and so good at making people laugh that they all think no further about you than how funny you are
They just wanna be with you so they can laugh and just when you think they like you enough to wanna hear you talking about yourself, to see the tears as well as the laughter, you realize that, that is part of you that no one cares about
No one bothers talking to you without having to ask you yourself about how you feel
Someone told me that i am good at figuring people out, but no one has ever cared enough to figure me out
When some one whom you care about most, tells you that they are the reason why you are alone, it means that they also can tell how alone you are
But it still
....
Never mind. I'm pretty sure it's just me
It's such a nightmare